Expected Nonsense – Bright

Bright? More like Dim…

Howdy folks, welcome to my very first review.

This time around, I decided to let you good people in on my thoughts about the Netflix original film “Bright“. The film is a mix of crime, drama, fantasy and action. Directed by David Ayer and starring Will “I’ve made a bad choice being in this movie” Smith and Joel “hopefully my career doesn’t take a hit” Edgerton.

The movie is a mess, unworthy of the talent assembled to create it.

It takes place in present day Los Angeles where humans live along side mythical creatures such as elves, dwarfs and orcs. Apparently in the past there was some epic battle requiring the races to unite in order to defeat The Dark Lord. Now there exists an uneasy truce among the different races and Smith‘s Ward character is paired with first Orc police officer from the country, Edgerton’s Jakoby.

I suppose there is some statement about race, law enforcement, social injustice and class division in America today, but I have no idea what it is. The elves are the wealthy class running the show, humans are– well I couldn’t really tell you where they fit in– and the orcs are the lowest of the low.

Now, this magic wand turns up and only a “Bright” can handle the silly thing. Anyone else simply explodes from the raw power. Now I’m going to assume you’re smart and can think while walking. If you can you’ve probably figured out the movie from what little details I’ve provided. The social underpinnings that writer Max Landis, who’s dad John gave us great films like “The Blues Brothers” and “An American Werewolf in London” (talent must truly skip a generation), are nonexistent while trying to appear.

With zero character development and no moments that struck me as entertaining, I’ve got to say, don’t waste your time gang.

We here at Cinemaslice assign a reel scale to our reviews. With a 6 reel rating being the best and a 0 reel rating being a “Gigli”‘ I hate to say it folks, but this clunker only gets one reel.

The cast is misused and the performances feel forced. The action and effects are the only things worth watching this train wreck. Let’s hope everyone involved in the production of this disaster has learned from their mistakes and get back on track.

Unfortunately, lack of plot, special effects and ridiculous action sequences are the norm in Hollywood so expect “Bad Boys 3” and “untitled Bright sequel” in the near future.

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Well what is there to say that hasn't already been said? I'm a middle-aged movie buff who has been actively reviewing movies for as long as I can remember. I love cinema in all it's forms. I am a fan of the greats like Huston and Welles all the way to Michael Mann and of course Scorsese. But I love those diamonds in the rough. The ones you have to dig to find. I hope to bring to those to light for you...

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